doce

fwwlike tearing my head apart right now..lack of sleep maybe or sleeping too late hehe...

sebelas..contd

seven hours ago i made my first post here's the second one..

clouds rolled by the sky today,
like stained carpets unfurled.
to many young children's dismay,
for wat seemed ,the end of the world.
windows screeched and curtains fray,
hurried by the rowdy spray.
as rains rush by, so did the clouds,
as the sun drove them away...

sebelas

another day of when i come round to the site and wished that i have something to type ...

ever had one of this days when you have someting on your mind and it buzzes around you so bad that you can't sleep or eat or even watch tv in peace...

well this is one such day for me.. i think i put my foot in a bucket of poo.. the feeling is quite there..just waiting for when the shit hits the fan..

lets hope that things work out fine.. for all.. although i have no idea how mine will workout..

-end-

dieci ...contd...

a day with you, a season...
when flowers bloom, for no reason...
the bees do fly,
in the flowers they pry...
to find nectar, in the sun do glisten...

a season with you, a day..
where the kids, all happy and gay..
with the sun in the sky,
oh how lucky am i..
i'm so happy, i've got nothing to say..

every second past, deserves another..
past seems like seconds, as we remember..
as the photos yellow,
and i, a grey, old, fellow
i'll still love you,
as i did forever...

by myloh
19.october.2004

dieci

dieci is ten in italian

it has been a long day..but the kind that could have you laughing at the end of the day... utterly sinful too..had loads of goodies.. most of the stuff that has been goign on for the past few days have cleared and i hhave much less on my mind and yet just as much cos the exams are drawing near...*gasps in horror*

today picked up some read .. curious cos maxim just launch themselves so thot i would take a look.. its the same stuff like men how to and stuff and the suggestively "girls trying too hard to look hot pictures".. hahaha well thot one piece inside was worth the discussion.. it was one of the men how to.. to those who disagree may want to post up your comments at the tagboard.. hehe

one of the more interesting ones was that these dating tips in more cases thatn one.. seem to lead to the part where the girls get laid..or something like that.. at times like this i was beginning to wonder wat the society sees men as..it kinda portrays us as this social(sexually rather) deprived creatures just let out of our cages and roaming around looking for targets to make out with...this is insane.. or downright stupid...and the worse was one part when they mention something bout "if you made love with the girl but do no want to see her again tactic" is our society realy that shallow to allow such things to happen..???

men may be pigs.. but there should still be men who are at least virgin pigs like ME..hehehehe

so-ne-la

so-ne-la is nine in cherokee for the uninitiated...

today spent some bit of time having some fun with my friend(she is really just a friend and i am still single.. hahah) joyce.. a bit of fun amidst the dilemmas that life has been throwing at myself or that i have thrown at myself...
i sometimes think of why some pple just go over the edge... most cases over the edge of a really tall building does it really bring about the sense of peace or that it really releases the soul and brings them to a more peaceful realm??? recently alot of "down the building" cases have been heard of..just hope that those pple could find something to hold them back..

today went out with a primary school friend joyce.. have not seen her in ages and boy have she changed.. most of us did..i did not really got in contact if not for certain incidents that occured.. so today was like a brother sister "outing" and it was quite fun going to the karaoke... then this joyce friend started to tell me of my palm.. she apparently picked it up from some where.. i was not sure of wat she said though a little doubtful.. even though i kinda am a believer in the horoscopes i have to agree that alot i can't be sure off the "predictions" cos i seriously could not prove it...heheh

i finally flatten out some folds through me "day off" with my friend.. it took my mind off enough to let me see certain things thats been going on.. (that shows a rest is good).. well i kinda screwed up during an "engagement" with a friend..not hostile but i kinda can't find the word for it at the moment..well it turned out really bad i was all tongue tied and stuff.. well i got into a little bit of a mess and when i was asked to explain wat was going on within my self i was even more tongue-tied and ended up gabbling away...well to whom it may concern if you read this..i need a little confirmation from you but your answers were pretty vague and i did not mean to push you for it but i think i kinda snapped out at the moment and just really screwed up.. hope you get this..

well personal stuff aside.. got work to do..

-end of post-

otto

to day i face the blaring screen while having ruff rydin' by dmx in the background...i screwed up totally on one and i am feeling a little bit like the brighter side of the planet.. but yet on the other end i feel like a bastard... i totally flipped and shadowed sorta by this "darker self" boy do i hate myself now.


...

Shichi/ Nana

just in case most of you are wondering .. the title of this post is actually seven in japanese...day has been ok with the regular peaks and troughs so there isn't much to talk about..haha

since i have nothing in particular to say today but since i am already here i might as well just type something...to all who read my blog.. i am not sure how many actaully remembers the movie [[you've got mail]]... it seems like only yesterday that i saw it..well thats the truth..literally(i had the vcd and i kept it in cold storage like forever and only manaage to dig it up from the abyss yesterday so i sat back and watched the show)... i was in primary school back then i think and it was kinda rare to go out for a movie so i wasn't really a movie buff but one day my sis took me out for an "outing" and we decided to catch a movie.. her treat of course.. hehhe... at the beginning i was sceptical abot the show although it starred meg ryan who until today is still my favourite hollywood actress apart from sphie marceau.. haha..

amazingly after so many years i still found the show refreshing especially when to seemingly unassociated characters just found one another by some freak force of nature..of course meg looks much better in this show..without her new pouty collagen filled lips...ewww*

remebering the times when i first got my vcd of you've got mail i used to watch it everyday without fail...to the state of almost remembering the conversations..(how sick could i get???)but it was beautiful to see such stories i mean this kind of stories hacve been put up on the silver screen perhaps as early as when technicolor came out with colour movies... but the itsy bitsy details in the movie i think is wat amde it really nice.. the nice music at the right time of the movie and also the onscreen chemistry between tom hanks and meg ryan...how sweet if this could happen in real life...

here are some pieces of extracts form the movie that strummed my heartstrings..

The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall! Decaf! Cappuccino!

Kevin, this girl is the most adorable creature I've ever been in contact with. And if she turns out to be as good looking as a mailbox, I would be foolish not to turn my life upside down and MARRY her.

Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life - well, valuable but small. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave?

If I really knew you, I know what I would find -- instead of a brain, a cash register, instead of a heart, a bottom line.

I like to start my letters off to you as if we're already in the middle of a conversation. I pretend that we are the oldest and dearest of friends as oppose to which we actually are, people who don't know eachothers names and met in a chatroom which we both claimed we'd never been to before. What will NY152 say today I wonder. I turn on my computer, I sign on, I wait impatiently as it connects and my chest catches my breath as I hear three little words. 'You've Got Mail' I hear nothing, not a sound on the city streets just the beat of my own heart. I have mail-- from you.

I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils, if I knew your name and address.

-end of post-

VI

a little elated today first comment about my blog.. sorry but i haven actually gotten into this yet so i've got loads of first itmes.. and the coments weren't the nice blog or yo watsup kind.. this person actually gave me that bit of insight that brought my perspective back in balance.

a little lost too today... lost my mind... lost for words...

the fifth????

second post in one day???

today been shopping...hahahha

most pple must be thinking a guy shopping??hahah
well its more like an afternoon with nothing to do headed out to grab a bite but ended up looking around...

was in takashimaya to buy a book and was looking around when the hugo boss showcase totally got me salivating over it..it seems i have this thing for lanyards from my green quiksilver one to simple 3 dollar ones form pasar malam.. hahha (lanyard fetish???) well had been hunting high and low for collectable ones..
back to the hugo boss shocase i saw this lime green colour ( one of my more like colours) lanyard with silver wordings .. absolutely chic man.. then pluck up my courage and pushed through the doors of the shop..only to be greeted by a relatively feminine specimen of a male... *goosepimples rising* but i chose to ignore him and asked him out right if that was a lanyard and how much it cost..
he said that it was atached to a jacket and later my ass of a mouth ended asking for the price (wat in god's green earth was i doin???) he dropped the bombshell on me by unflinchingly telling me that it cast $1507.80 .... me being totally flabbergasted intuitively smiled and turned towards the direction of the door where my friend colin was looking around...i swear never to step into that shop man.. super embarrassing..* slap myself*

after that picked up myslef to p.s for a game of intial-d (manga inspired japanese street mod cum crazy driving style kinda game) before heading home

the fourth....sigh...man...am i wordy or wat...

tests are looming nearer and nearer as the second needle ticks on the face of a seemingly small watch face.. it seems that time is passing ever that slowly yet some how it turns its back on you by slapping you in the face an telling you how much time had past since the last breath was drawn...

turned nutz on books lately..actually not really lately.. but more of a three month ago think when i started reading the davinci code by dan brown.. absolutely intriguing read i must say..and followed closely by angels and demons... the books later brought me into this frenzy of reading for pleasure.. i was a never a reader before i touched dan brown..i happen to not be acompulsive reader who is constantly hungry for books to munch and swallow down whole. at one book a week i deem myself as normal considering books as think as the ones by dan brown but some pple i knew could do the book in three days..( are they nuts or do they have too much time???)

the dan brown reading frenzy then lead me to the topics of religion at its roots..also because of how controversial it is that lead me to want to find out more..in the end i spent sinful amounts on books... this topic however leads to the realisation of the simple question of "why are we here???" in most of the online publications, men try to find meaning but unknowingly "invent" something to rely on and encompass them to believe to assure them selves of wat could not be explained.

how do we know 1, is 1 and why we call a man, a man and not a woman... this proves that men have been tryin to rationalise their own complications by finding origins to that deemed essential answer to make out lifes more assured but will it???

the third one..

seriously i am beginning to wonder how some of the people who own blogs are able to sustain it for so long..ever wonders wat happeens waith the content..most people do it like sort of a diary sorta thing.. but ain't a diary suppose to be private??? while most pple adopte the expository method.. but humans beings seriously, aren't wat they were at the beginning of civilisation... we aren't all that naive to believe all that is type d out on the blog.. are we>>??

anycase.. the days been kinda mixed up..it was sad cos i totally have my ass for the roasting for this rounds quiz... but consolation came in the form of a movie treat form my freind and the nice comforts of home..hahha...one of my computer's monitors when up in smoke making it one of the many before it to be trashed as soon as someone is diligent enough to raise their butts and lift up the monitor from its current resting place to where it belong(in the trash can) where it shall rest in pieces.....

till i blog again..
adieu.. ..

my second blog...

i wonder how pple could blog day after day after day.. and yet producing pieces of blogs that are deemed interesting.. this makes me think very much about how colourful are the lives of others and how much mine sucked... today its a very usual saturday.. wakin up at 10.30 and stuff... normally my dad would kill me and nag my ass of with the wake up early and get some house work done theory...well he's outstation so i manage to get that extra bit of sleep... then after breakfast and some tv it was 12.... time sure flys..
after lunch i was inspired to do up my door.. not a usual thing to do on asat afternoon.. but i did it any way... turned out kinda nice..not sure..but it sure looked beter thatn my ex-door..heheh



----end of blog----

first blog ever

been checking some books on psychology and trying to get to know myself a bit more... it was called the dewey color system.... you basically choose your favourite colour in a certain list and they give you a little "insight"into your self...like they classify the neutral colours like black and white as achromatics and this is wat they say about a guy who likes white like me..

my hopes

you give the gift of knowledge. your suggestions make others slow down and consider all the options. your objectivity gives you and others the ability to consider things thoroughly. when you get what you wish, your hope is renewed. you bring optimistic agendas and problem-solving skills to situations.

my fears

under pressure , you step back to gain objectivity. However, too much distance cause you to lose sight of what's most important to you. it can keep you from making the best of existing situations. slow down. remember to give your feelings equal power. you will know better wat you want. your world will feel more solid.

things to feed my soul(this i shrug my shoulders about)

when you have enough space , everyone benefits. having breathing room in your work environment and relationships gives you the power not to get bogged down with problems. you also gain the ability to tell people about new ways to make their lives better...

there is still loads more but i think it may scare some pple off..

and i realised my strange ability today.. i actually blurted out to myself in public.. like self conversation.. and when i realised wat was happening.. i found my self surround by goggling eyes closing in around me.. like i am soem mental patient standing by for inspection sort.. and this bunch of secondary school gals were basically laughing their a**es off..bloody embarassing..